Mount Rushmore

My history teacher spoke about Mount Rushmore. He said 4 Presidents were carved into stone but admitted he wasn’t sure which one was President Rushmore.

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Airline Flight

Before boarding my flight, I was questioned by airport security why I had a light bulb in my left pocket. I said, “Because I have a lamp in my right one.”

Learning French

My German shepherd has been taking foreign language lessons. He’s learning to bark in French from a poodle.

Job Resume

I’m looking for a job. I had to update my resume. For a 10-year period when I wasn’t working I put “running errands”. My wife suggested, “I had a cold”. My brother suggested  “lost at sea”. I went with that.

Commercials

I’ve been watching too much TV. While conversing with my wife, she paused for a moment and I expected a commercial.

Astronomy for Beginners

If the Earth is round and has satellites orbiting it, why can’t our heads, which are also round, have satellites orbiting them?

Changed a Diaper

Changed my son’s diaper today.
As you can see, it was a challenge.