It was recently discovered that Aliens gave the Vikings deodorant and thus doubled their life expectancy.
My mother will never admit to anything. If I accused her of being a woman, she would deny it.
I’m very tired today. This morning I waited for the bus and when it arrived, the driver didn’t open the door. He only lets me ride if he likes the tie I’m wearing. Apparently he didn’t like it this morning.
When I got to work, I discovered that my office had been relocated to another building across town. I had to rent a truck and move my desk, file cabinets and computer into the new one. I completed the move by lunchtime. After lunch, my boss told me they decided to move me back.
After work, I had to walk home. I changed my tie but the driver still wouldn’t pick me up. As he drove past he shouted, “Wear the blue one tomorrow!”
I took a taxi home and the driver wore an eye-patch over his left eye. When he stopped at a red light, he moved it to his right eye. It was awkward.
I’ve never known Peace and Quiet. But I have known Fred and Ethel.