Political Revolutionary

I considered becoming a political revolutionary until I learned the hours weren’t steady and you couldn’t collect unemployment.

From my book – Good Morning: Your Guide to Utter Nonsense   Available on Amazon. If you don’t have a Kindle just download the app for your Mac or Windows computer.

Silent Auction

My friend won the grand prize at a silent auction – a farm. Ten thousand boxes of dirt are being delivered to her apartment.

From my book – Good Morning: Your Guide to Utter Nonsense
Available on Amazon. If you don’t have a Kindle just download the app
for your Mac or Windows computer.

Sublet

The elevator in my building is nicer than my apartment so I sublet my apartment and moved into the elevator.

From my book – Good Morning: Your Guide to Utter Nonsense

Available on Amazon. If you don’t have a Kindle just download the app

for your Mac or Windows computer.

Dad

A man claiming to be my son had a court order for a paternity test. I thought he looked too old to be my son but I took the test and the results showed I was his son.

From my book – Good Morning: Your Guide to Utter Nonsense
Available on Amazon. If you don’t have a Kindle just download the app
for your Mac or Windows computer.

New Home

I moved into a new home that runs on batteries. The realtor recommended it as protection in case of a power failure. However, it’s difficult to buy 10,000 AAA batteries at a time.

From my new book – Good Morning: Your Guide to Utter Nonsense
Available on Amazon. If you don’t have a Kindle just download the app
for your Mac or Windows computer. Thanks!

Psychic Powers

I took a college course on “How to Develop Your Psychic Powers”. While in class my wife called and said all of the spoons suddenly bent.

From my new book – Good Morning: Your Guide to Utter Nonsense
Available on Amazon. If you don’t have a Kindle just download the app
for your Mac or Windows computer. Thanks!

Hotel Stay

Recently I was trapped in a hotel elevator for 8 hours. I fell asleep on the floor and when rescued was charged for an overnight stay.

From my book – Good Morning: Your Guide to Utter Nonsense
Available on Amazon. If you don’t have a Kindle just download the app
for your Mac or Windows computer. Thanks!

Bigfoot? Is he European?

Who is the mysterious Bigfoot? Where does this creature come from? A passage from the diary of Christopher Columbus suggests that one Bigfoot might have been aboard.
“Tis a strange creature aboard my ship. We know not where the beast comes from and we are all afraid to inquire for fear of losing a limb. It does make itself useful by killing any giant fish that attacks our ship. I do worry about one thing, the creature has exhibited a hearty appetite and crewmembers have been disappearing.”
Could Bigfoot have arrived in America aboard a Columbus expedition? That would make the creature of European descent. Without a DNA sample, however, exact country of origin is not possible.

My Son, the Musician

When guests overstay their welcome, I have my son play his clarinet. The police have expressed interest in hiring him for crowd control.

Family Conversation

I didn’t start talking until I was 8. My mom thought I had a developmental problem. Actually I was avoiding conversation with my family.