Mom and her Career

When I was born my mom gave up her day job as a bank robber instead working from home as a money launderer. When I turned 18, she no longer had the energy to rob banks again and considered embezzlement. I suggested counterfeiting because she had an eye for detail.

Looking for Work

I considered becoming a political revolutionary until I learned the hours weren’t steady and you couldn’t collect unemployment.

Mom and her Career

When I was born my mom gave up her day job as a bank robber instead working from home as a money launderer. When I turned 18, she no longer had the energy to rob banks again and considered embezzlement. I suggested counterfeiting because she had an eye for detail.

Dedicated Employee

I worked as a security guard in a funeral parlor. There was an incident where a deceased man wasn’t deceased and he tried to leave. I made sure he didn’t.

College Job

I worked my way through college as a substitute dictator. If a government were overthrown I’d hold power until another dictator was found.

Work from Home

I woke up late today for work. I work in a shoe factory on an assembly line stitching together shoes. I called my boss to let him know. He told me to work from home. 

From my book Good Morning: Your Guide to Utter Nonsense Available on Amazon.

The Circus

I got a job working in a circus to pay for college. Eventually the college threw me out because I was followed by clowns all day.

From my book – Good Morning: Your Guide to Utter Nonsense   Available on Amazon.

Applying for a Job

I applied for a job in a restaurant. The man interviewing me said that he wanted someone with astronaut experience. I showed him a photo of the moon that I kept in my wallet. I start next week.

To be continued…

Working my Way through College

I worked my way through college as a substitute dictator. If a government were overthrown I’d hold power until another dictator was found.

Looking for Work

I considered becoming a political revolutionary until I learned the hours weren’t steady and you couldn’t collect unemployment.